Golfing With Whigs

The temptation to write about current events is almost overwhelming. While this blog is primarily dedicated to writing about concepts and ideas, the use of timely examples in doing so makes it more interesting to most folks, at least the ones who read these essays. It's a crowded field however and most of the people who get paid to write do a better job of it than those of us who engage in it to fill the time between golf seasons.

Although my writing handicap is even larger than my golf handicap, I enjoy both without excelling at either. So far I haven't figured out how to write between shots, so "in season" scribbling takes a back seat to power squibbing tee balls. It's a good guess that my golf partners (particularly my dear friend Skinny) enjoy watching the latter more than reading the former.

Having said that, since it's not yet golf season in Chicago and since the political equivalent of the dreaded "worm-burner" -the Illinois Primary- is over, their only remaining giggle option might be my ruminations about the dreadful state of affairs currently besetting us.

It's about the same (pitifully small) number of options available to us after the selection of candidates for the uni-party elections of this coming fall. By my count, in the ILLinois Senatorial contest you will be given a choice of which Democrat to vote for to replace the retiring statesman Roland Burris who is most famous for his tombstone and his method of entry into "the world's greatest deliberative body." Buying the Senate seat from future prison inmate Blago right under the watchful eye of the feds was just a small added expense for chiseling the office onto his monument to himself, particularly since he didn't have bear the cost himself.

Let's look at the "choices." One of the guys is Alexi Giannoulias. (A name which sounds more like a Russian hockey player than a failing small banker)  His main claims to fame are being money man for Tony Rezko (Obama's real estate benefactor) and being Obama's frequent basketball chum(p).

The other guy is the winner of the pretend Republican Party primary, congressman Mark Kirk.  He represents a district of mostly liberal people but gets elected as a Republican anyway because, you just can't fool the folks up in Highland Park, they know a kindred spirit when they see one. So let's call him a Whig in deference to his penchant for giving free advertising to the firm that offers "two rooms for the price of one" by wearing their product on his head. (The other Whig candidate, Andy 'cat head' McKenna lost his bid for Republican nominee for Governor.)

Being flush with actual choices isn't common in the Land of (nod and) Wincoln, so my disappointment is purely theoretical. Perhaps in November, Kirk will prevail during the backlash against the Chavez style government takeovers by the "Yes we Can" Chicago connection in Washington.

But if he does, the "victory" will be like winning a hole in match play golf by making a bogey while your opponent makes a triple. You are glad you didn't lose, but you know you didn't really win.