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5/27/10

A Little Something Different

Regular readers of this blog are used to seeing commentary on issues and ideas. But in the last two days I have had a couple of "close encounters of the weird kind" that I thought I would share. Just brief conversations, but strange enough to make you get that quizzical "Mayor Daley look" on your face and mutter "Wha, Wha, Wha, Wha" like he does when he is confused. (Actually, he's perpetually confused, but that for a different day.)

The first one occurred while I was playing golf with my wife at our regular course. As I was walking toward the right rough/trees to begin the search for my ball I noticed the lady who was playing in front of us going back and forth in the same general area on her cart doing the same task. She seemed to give up fairly quickly and dropped a new one down in front of the green and continued her game.

Meanwhile, we found one which didn't belong to me and then the one I was playing. After determining that it did not belong to the only other players in the area, I put it in my pocket and told Carol I guessed it belonged to the lady ahead and we could return it to her when we caught up.

As planned, we caught up after the next hole and from a distance of about thirty yards as I held the ball up over my head I hollered out to them,
"Excuse me, were you looking for a Nike back there on the second hole?"
"Yes, she answered, did you find it?"
"Um.......Yeah." (Huh?)

Then today, while doing some landscaping work in my front yard, a rather odd looking, (in a way I really can't describe well) but very friendly man whom I had never seen before was walking by and the following conversation took place.

The odd walker makes eye contact and says, "Hello!"
"Hi"
"No need to join a health club, eh? Just keep working with that shovel out here and you keep fit!"
"Well, I don't know about keeping fit...."
"So, do you like living here?"
"Um yeah, I must, I have been doing it for decades"
"Must be better than living over in Oak Hills!"
"Really? What's going on over there?"
"Oh the people are all jerks."
"No kidding, how so?"
"Stuck up idiots" "They won't even talk to you" "Bunch of old people, they just stare at you."
"Yeah, there is quite a few older folks living over there, some might be kind of suspicious I guess."
"The Irish are even worse than the Jews!"
(It's anyone's guess what that was all about, I think I'd rather not know.)
So I finished the conversation, "It must be a tough place to live if your name is Briscoe." *
He looked puzzled, "I guess so."

It must be my lucky day, my favorite idiot bigots are the friendly talkative kind.
Like I said, a little something different.


* William Briscoe claims that Irish Jews are the friendliest Jews in the world (and the most inclined to enjoy a pint)! Shalom Ireland tells the untold story of how Ireland's affable and ambitious Jewish community came to be a major influence in shaping both Ireland and Israel. A talented, hard-working, profoundly civic group of people, Jews from Ireland served in such prominent positions as Lord Mayor of Dublin, first chief rabbi of Israel, and president of Israel.

4 comments:

Skooks said...

Jigga WHA?

Anonymous said...

Look Irish
Dress British
Trade Yiddish
(favorite trading floor button of all time)

Neil said...

I'm always completely shocked by peoples willingness to reveal their bigotry and racism to anyone who will listen. In this case a complete stranger. "Because I'm white and your white, you MUST not be offended when I make jokes about other races." What if you had a Jewish wife in the house. Or even worse...AN IRISH WIFE! He would have no idea of that but just blurted it out after talking to you for 2 minutes. You should have hit him in the head with that shovel.

And you should have beamed that clueless lady on the golf course in the head with her own ball.

I find sometimes people really need a good smack in the head. I'ts really you providing a service to them. They would probably have thanked you.

Anonymous said...

Watch out, they live among us! Oh! I have to go to the health club.